CONTRIBUTIONS

Sit down with your parents and talk about the type of day that you want, ask them if they have an amount in mind which they want to contribute or if they would rather you work through the budget together to see where they will help out. The following list highlights some of the issues that should be discussed and agreed at this stage:

• Do your parents want to cover the traditional costs assigned to parents of the Bride/Groom?

• Do they want to pay for certain elements of the Wedding?  Which ones?

• How much involvement will they have in the planning and organising (this should be jointly agreed)?

• How do they want to pay for things? Direct to the companies? A single cheque to yourselves? In instalments to yourselves?

There is no amount that can be expected. Traditionally, the largest contributions tend to come from the Bride's parents or guardians with a smaller contribution (in certain cases around 50%) from the Groom's equivalents. Other close relatives, grandparents or aunts and uncles for example, do not traditionally contribute but it is becoming more common these days for the odd pound or two to be forthcoming. If people want to pay for individual items, you may find the Who Pays for What? article particularly useful.

For anyone who offers to contribute, whilst not essential, a small gift (a nice bunch of flowers or a bottle of wine for instance) would be a nice touch. Having said that, they would probably be more appreciative of you listening to their thoughts, hopes and views for your Big Day. You don’t have to agree to anything, just listen and discuss their thoughts but make sure you explain how you see the day working. Discuss with your partner how you will keep both sets of parents involved and also, (and this could be the hard bit!) ensure that they firm up on their promises.