Every couple is different, and trying to cover scenarios for every family dynamic is an impossibility. That said, etiquette for engagement announcements dictates that there is a certain order in which people should be informed - this is outlined below:
1. If you already have children, they should be top of your list. Depending upon their ages and your previous marital history, engagement announcements to them may need to be approached with a great deal of care and thought.
2. Parents are typically second on the list. Not only did they bring you into this world and help make you the man or woman you are today, but there's a fair chance they'll be paying for part of the wedding, so don't offend them at this early stage by letting them in on the secret too late!
3. Close friends and relatives come next. You will also need to decide whether to tell certain relatives or if you are happy for your parents to let the family know (who we're sure will be more than eager to tell people on your behalf!).
4. Finally, general friends and work colleagues should be informed, but only after your nearest and dearest have been told the good news.
Making A Personal Engagement Annoucement
Regarding the wording of face to face engagement announcements, don’t rehearse a speech, just stand up and let the words flow – you’ll find it all comes very naturally. For those searching for the opening gambit, how about:
'Mum, Dad - we've got something to tell you...'
'You'll never guess what's just happened!'
or even...
'You'd better sit down...'
Of course, if you're really struggling for the ideal words, a quick flash of the engagement ring, or the beaming smile on your faces will surely give it away!
For friends and relatives from further a field e-mail and social networking sites are great ways to make engagement announcements - you can attach photographs of the two of you and the ring for added personalisation. Cards for engagement announcements are growing in popularity, or for those ahead of the game, why not combine the announcement with a 'Save the Date' card? Whetever you opt for, expect a flurry of phonecalls, texts, congratulatory messages and perhaps even gifts shortly after the word gets out!
Formal Engagement Announcements
Whilst formal engagement announcements in a newspaper is far less popular than in the past, don’t let this put you off – if you wish to shout it from the rooftops, go for it, it’s your time. Unless you're planning on taking out a slot in a national tabloid, typical engagement announcements in a local newspaper won't be too expesive, and it doesn't need to tell every detail of what happened. A sample newspaper engagment announcement is as follows:
Andrew and Rebecca Smith, of Solihull, West Midlands
are delighted to announce the engagement of their daughter,
Catherine Jane, to Stephen Mark
son of Peter and Jean Taylor of Peterlee, Co. Durham.
A Quick Word on Engagement Parties
As you tell more and more people the happy news, undoubtedly the question of a party will crop up. Don’t feel pressured into doing something you don’t want to do – in fact the best way to avoid this is to have some thoughts about what celebration, if any, you want before you make your engagement announcements. For more info and ideas on celebrating, be sure to check out our engagement parties article.
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